I don't know how often we wonder about the future, it's perhaps more than one anticipates. One thing we probably underestimate consciously is how every single action we take in present could lead us to a different future.
Every single moment, every single action we take can lead us to a path unknown, untraversed, and unimagined. If we could see every future, we end up with every action we take, we'd not be able to stop analyzing our self from the action.
The more we think, the more paranoid we get and don't enjoy our present. But it is not completely unfair, because one minute now can determine months or years later. What then would be a good balance between enjoying the present and not worrying about the future.
Surely, you would not want to jump out of the window of a high building to feel that adrenaline rush for a few seconds before hitting the ground and leave your future blank and non-existent. Also, you would not want to think for 5 hours buying a t-shirt thinking what would people think of you, perhaps a t-shirt might catch someone's eye and help get you a friend who then influences your life for good in a way you did not imagine.
Sometimes, I see my future changing and probably not for best yet, I feel obligated to continue on it. I could see one path would lead me to a job of a lower standard and I went ahead with it because the future did not look bad. Sometimes, I put a foot in my mouth in spite of knowing that it's going to the diss of certain people and would yield my current venture futile. Perhaps I do it in the interest of truth, that maybe this is my current truth and it may not be a true month from now, but this is what I think and should not be holding it back even at the cost of my future. But in these actions, there is rarely a joy to be derived because even when you get what you want more often than not, we or at least I am worried about the future that I missed.
So when you are looking at me and talking to me, I would be trying to look and imagine my future. While your action would be predicated on my present action, my present action is predicated on my dubious future path. So you don't like my actions because I am not in my present, but I fail to in account that your present action could also dictate my frail future. So the future that I so wanted to protect from vanishes because I wanted it to happen. There are a bazillion things that could happen which would prevent you from having your future which you have your eye on, while you are concentrating on avoiding one path, the other path has already inserted itself on your journey.
This Is how it is, being me. So far I have counted and missed out on 1308584589384983492 futures I envisioned. Maybe it's time I give up worrying about my action, maybe it's time I learn to forgive myself or accept that I am not going to be able to master it.
Maybe it's time, I make up my mind what I am writing about before I begin writing it.
Every single moment, every single action we take can lead us to a path unknown, untraversed, and unimagined. If we could see every future, we end up with every action we take, we'd not be able to stop analyzing our self from the action.
The more we think, the more paranoid we get and don't enjoy our present. But it is not completely unfair, because one minute now can determine months or years later. What then would be a good balance between enjoying the present and not worrying about the future.
Surely, you would not want to jump out of the window of a high building to feel that adrenaline rush for a few seconds before hitting the ground and leave your future blank and non-existent. Also, you would not want to think for 5 hours buying a t-shirt thinking what would people think of you, perhaps a t-shirt might catch someone's eye and help get you a friend who then influences your life for good in a way you did not imagine.
Sometimes, I see my future changing and probably not for best yet, I feel obligated to continue on it. I could see one path would lead me to a job of a lower standard and I went ahead with it because the future did not look bad. Sometimes, I put a foot in my mouth in spite of knowing that it's going to the diss of certain people and would yield my current venture futile. Perhaps I do it in the interest of truth, that maybe this is my current truth and it may not be a true month from now, but this is what I think and should not be holding it back even at the cost of my future. But in these actions, there is rarely a joy to be derived because even when you get what you want more often than not, we or at least I am worried about the future that I missed.
So when you are looking at me and talking to me, I would be trying to look and imagine my future. While your action would be predicated on my present action, my present action is predicated on my dubious future path. So you don't like my actions because I am not in my present, but I fail to in account that your present action could also dictate my frail future. So the future that I so wanted to protect from vanishes because I wanted it to happen. There are a bazillion things that could happen which would prevent you from having your future which you have your eye on, while you are concentrating on avoiding one path, the other path has already inserted itself on your journey.
This Is how it is, being me. So far I have counted and missed out on 1308584589384983492 futures I envisioned. Maybe it's time I give up worrying about my action, maybe it's time I learn to forgive myself or accept that I am not going to be able to master it.
Maybe it's time, I make up my mind what I am writing about before I begin writing it.
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