Profession of deranged mind

Can you read my thoughts ?..I think you can ,otherwise what would would be the point of having them..I don't have much time I must tell you few things..

I think it really started about a year ago in January.I met with an accident which changed my life ..you see I became delusional ..It is getting increasingly difficult for me to differentiate between dreams , reality ,past ,present or so people say..I find everythg to be very real..

It was holi and I wanted to play with you ,I came to your house but you were playing with someone else..It seemed very intimate ..I did not want to intrude..So I started leaving..I called you in the evening to wish you..but you told me I already wished you in the morning when we were playing holi ..A never foreseen smile spread across my face ...

It was holi and I wanted to play with you , I came to your house but you were playing with someone else..It seemed very intimate ..I did not want to intrude ..but I could not help my self ..I could not control..I wanted to touch your face the way he did... see that smile on your face again..I approached you but you were going away..I tried to follow you..but you were too fast I could not keep up..

I called you again few days later and expressed my one wish.. my only wish... to take you to a beach... I saw you at the beach ..I started running towards you but I was already there..there with you..we were walking hand in hand..and I (with whom you were walking ) said something that made you laugh..I wanted to see your face I came closer to you ..but before I could see you I caught a glimpse of myself... I seemed in better phyiscal condition ..I was slimmer , taller..but then I realised its not me..it was the same guy who played holi with you ..You saw me and seemed surprised by my sudden appearance..I gestured towards the sea and I knew you understood..I wanted you to accompany me..you ran behind me not to accompany me but perhaps to save me..but he held you back..

I cannot swim and I am glad for it..I see a big wave comign towards me it will engulf me and free me from every reality...I continue walking.....In next few moments I would wake up to reality or eliminate it once and for all..